By The Birds and The Bees Staff
We present to you the top ten reasons to read The Birds and the Bee Do More than Hum and Buzz. If you feel like you need more context for why you should read us then scroll down and you have the complete collection of The Birds and The Bees' articles exactly as they were originally published. Without further ado…
1.) We’ve Grown Apart (In the Literal Sense)
A.) Our perceptions have slightly changed due to changes within our own lives. Some of us have become significant others to someone else so, we obviously we have changes in our outlook on our specified topics. We are now able to speak from both sides of the fence with fact.
B.) Older us old dudes get the better we get. Yes cliché….but so true. As the reader you can decide if each one of us is whiskey or some aged wine. Ex. Mr. SR...C is like Blue label. Great simile!
C.) The year between our last article and this article have been good for us. Disappointment, development, detox, retox, the new Britney Spears CD, growth, bills, taxes, rent, getting jobs, losing jobs, quitting jobs, being jobless, hating jobs, making amends, making friends, making money, making dinner, making mistakes, roommates, housemates, mating, deflating egos, buying shoes, motivating each other to succeed, watching each other make it, debating back and forth on whether or not this project is worth doing and taking seriously: all of these things have made us better, wiser, more mature, and surely better authors of this blog, column, misshapen short story. Our year absence is a reason to love us again...or anew.
A.) Now we know we don’t know it all but we can share a lot and help you think. Four unique perspectives on all kinds of topics coming together to create the Birds and the Bees is the definitely diversity coming together. So basically us plus you plus some blue stuff creates Captain Planet!
A.) We are straight raw and kind of delicious. Minds out the gutter… We give you our most blunt opinion and sometimes it nourishes those minds of yours. Like health food for the brain, smoothie king for the heart. Still though we bring the spice like wasabi and taste like the soy.
B.) We're exactly what you need... even if we aren't. This blog stands not as the key place to find The Truth, but instead as somewhere to find a truth as we see it. We insist on saying what we mean and meaning what we say, sans filter and apology.
4.) Mr. SR...C will touch the most dedicated reader we have at the end of the 2011 fiscal year.
A.) This is probably not true, but there is the odd possibility.
5.) Prove Us Wrong
A.) We are open and encourage feedback on all topics discuss. We do not back down from the question WHY. Bring it on, feedback is our friend and helps foster great discussions. Debate is welcome and suggestions are appreciated. The truth is all we ask of you- and to read, of course.
B.) We will respond to your most perplexing questions and situations, by providing adequate responses based on our expertise (Read: empirical) knowledge of people and relationships.
C.) The Professor personally promises to be held responsible for us responding to no less than one question a week in full article form. Not always his answer, but if there isn't one, he personally will accept 17 lashes in public. We will raffle off the rights to wield the whip if (more likely, when) the time comes. Reminder: Send all questions to Thebirdsandthebees10@gmail.com.
6.) Your FB, Twitter, and Google Reader feeds are all full of bullshit, Why not add something worth the time?
A.) This is true and self-explanatory.
7.)We Have a Purpose
A.) Even though we may have slightly altered our perceptions, we still believe that communication is the only way to bridge the gap between two individuals in a relationship. Given this, We will provide clever ways to open and maintain lines of communication with your significant other.
B.) This isn't just about how to talk to women. There are many more styles and directions of communication, so there are many bridges to build, we are your personal contracting company. We now have all of real adult life to fuel our writing and all the women of the world to act as muses. Except of course for those of us who don't... like those of us with serious girlfriends... wait, we are serious, right? Because if not I have a date tonight at 9. We are? Alright, then I am going to watch the Superbowl tonight at 9 at my friend's house. It's not football season? Hmmm... wait, did we say this wasn't only about women? Guess you'll have to wait around and see if we lied.
8.) We heart dogs.
A.) You don't like dogs if you don't read.
A.) Once you start reading we are something like an addiction.
10.) You Don't Know What You're in For.
A.) And neither do we. That's the best part. There isn't anything holding us back or guiding us. We came to the internet with one simple idea and will extend our writing (Read: tentacles) into whichever realms, topics, or subjects (read: Asian women) that we find suitable at the time. In fact that actually is another reason to read! Just to see if you can spot which of us made which terrible joke (Read: The Radical is the cause of all the ones that turn your stomach and offend even the most hardcore of relativists).