By The Birds and the Bees' Staff and The Reader(s)
This is the second of the reader response posts. We love your interactions with us and appreciate every one. We decided this week to post the full responses we've gotten outside of the comments to show some love, and let the other readers know what The Reader(s) are saying. The Reader(s) wrote this in response to “The Bees: Give the Ladies 13 'Do Nots' for the First Impression.” One of our most vocal readers provided this list for us, offering a female's equal and opposite list of things not to do to make a good first impression. She's pretty on point.
The Reader(s)'s email reads:
“Assuming the "first impression" starts with the introduction/initiation of the conversation and not the stare down from across the room... Here's my list of total turn offs that guys should never do unless they want to go home alone.
1. Do not use a corny pick-up line. They're not cute and we might "laugh" but we really think you're a loser.
Example: "How much does a polar bear weigh?.... Enough to break the ice! Hi I'm........."
2. Don't get so close that you're invading personal space. Crossing the personal space boundary distinguishes you from a good guy trying to hold a conversation and a creeper/Asian tickler
3. Do not ask me if I want to buy you a drink. You should be asking me that
4. Don't forget to compliment me. I must be convinced that you're approaching me because I'm the hottest girl in the room.
5. Don't approach me and then expect me to hold the entire conversation. Just like guys don't like ditsy girls that ramble on and on... girls don't like guys that stand there and just nod at everything we say,
6. Try to use proper English when you talk to us unless we don't speak English then well.... you have a problem of your own.
Example... do not walk up to us and be like: "Ay yo hottie what up"
ON THAT NOTE.......
7. DO NOT ever call me "girl" "babe" "hun" "sweetie" etc. You haven't earned that privilege just yet. Slow your roll.
8. Do not get caught looking at another girl. I shouldn't have to explain why.
9. Don't talk about your ex... ever. And don't blab about your "bros." We don't really want to hear about your friends unless you're trying to get us to hook up with one of them....
10. Don't get so drunk that you can't remember my name. Actually, if you're really that interested... just don't get THAT drunk. That's a clear indication of where I would stand in our relationship.
11. Be a little bit humble. Although we want to learn about you... we don't want to know about how much you love yourself and could never love anyone else as much as you love you.
AND FINALLY... MOST IMPORTANTLY....
12. DO NOT forget your deodorant, gum, and cologne. I will not speak to you if you reek from every orifice of your body and you're sweating like a pig on a sunny day down in hell.”
Keep sending us your responses and questions to firstname.lastname@example.org. We do love hearing from you.