By The Birds and the Bees' Staff and The Reader(s)
This is the second of the reader response posts. We love your interactions with us and appreciate every one. We decided this week to post the full responses we've gotten outside of the comments to show some love, and let the other readers know what The Reader(s) are saying. The Reader(s) wrote this in response to “The Bees: Give the Ladies 13 'Do Nots' for the First Impression.” One of our most vocal readers provided this list for us, offering a female's equal and opposite list of things not to do to make a good first impression. She's pretty on point.
The Reader(s)'s email reads:
“Assuming the "first impression" starts with the introduction/initiation of the conversation and not the stare down from across the room... Here's my list of total turn offs that guys should never do unless they want to go home alone.
1. Do not use a corny pick-up line. They're not cute and we might "laugh" but we really think you're a loser.
Example: "How much does a polar bear weigh?.... Enough to break the ice! Hi I'm........."
2. Don't get so close that you're invading personal space. Crossing the personal space boundary distinguishes you from a good guy trying to hold a conversation and a creeper/Asian tickler
3. Do not ask me if I want to buy you a drink. You should be asking me that
4. Don't forget to compliment me. I must be convinced that you're approaching me because I'm the hottest girl in the room.
5. Don't approach me and then expect me to hold the entire conversation. Just like guys don't like ditsy girls that ramble on and on... girls don't like guys that stand there and just nod at everything we say,
6. Try to use proper English when you talk to us unless we don't speak English then well.... you have a problem of your own.
Example... do not walk up to us and be like: "Ay yo hottie what up"
ON THAT NOTE.......
7. DO NOT ever call me "girl" "babe" "hun" "sweetie" etc. You haven't earned that privilege just yet. Slow your roll.
8. Do not get caught looking at another girl. I shouldn't have to explain why.
9. Don't talk about your ex... ever. And don't blab about your "bros." We don't really want to hear about your friends unless you're trying to get us to hook up with one of them....
10. Don't get so drunk that you can't remember my name. Actually, if you're really that interested... just don't get THAT drunk. That's a clear indication of where I would stand in our relationship.
11. Be a little bit humble. Although we want to learn about you... we don't want to know about how much you love yourself and could never love anyone else as much as you love you.
AND FINALLY... MOST IMPORTANTLY....
12. DO NOT forget your deodorant, gum, and cologne. I will not speak to you if you reek from every orifice of your body and you're sweating like a pig on a sunny day down in hell.”
Keep sending us your responses and questions to thebirdsandthebees10@gmail.com. We do love hearing from you.
Showing posts with label What Not To Do. Show all posts
Showing posts with label What Not To Do. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Thursday, August 11, 2011
The Bees: Give the Ladies 13 “Do Nots” for the First Impression
By The Birds and the Bees' Staff
How does every relationship start? “Hello.” Everyone with whom you've been intimate you met first. Ladies, for you, we've compiled a list of “Do Nots” to avoid making a bad first impression. But why wouldn't we compile a list of things to do to make a good impression? Because between the four of us we have four different perspectives on what leaves an impressive impression. Not all of us would have accepted being told that a young lady wouldn't be able to accept an invitation to a party because she had a previously arranged (presumably sexual) engagement that evening. A wise man once said, “That [girl] has no manners.” And now that young lady and the receptive young man are in the strongest relationship since the ending of Date Night. “But that ending wasn't very strong.” Yes, and this one either. Get it?
Anyways, it's much too simple to misstep during your first meeting with a guy. We can't account for all variables, but these are assured things NOT to do to lower the chances of such an out of line footfall. Here's the list as it would be read by one of our staff members (Hint: it's not [Doogie Howser,] MD) :
1. Don't keep staring if you're not going to talk.
I know its usually the man's job to be the aggressor, but, honestly, I know about the suffrage movement too. It's 2011, you can take the initiative too.
2. Don't give me the eyes when your man is in the room. Bad etiquette. Now I'm not a home wrecker, but you put enough blood in the water...you catch my drift.
3. Do not blend in with the crowd.
The beauty of many of the settings in which we meet people is how anonymous we can be to those that don't know us. We let loose and act in the group mentality. Stop yelling as your girlfriends pass you. I understand that you enjoy being out with your friends, but the tribal shriek of excitement is not cute.
4. Do not discuss a heavy topic (i.e. politics) unless you are ready to have a serious conversation and are willing to defend yourself/ No religion or politics talk please.
This depends heavily on the recipient, but until you gauge whether or not this is the kind of guy that refuses to take you seriously if you are only providing small talk avoid such topics.
5. Do not play dumb under the irrational belief that it somehow makes you physically more attractive.
6. Don't wear a skimpy outfit and spend the entire time tugging at your skirt and trying to hide your cleavage. You spent at least an hour getting dressed with the lights on; you knew what look you were going for.
Speaking of which, if you look like a hoe I'm going to assume you're a hoe. Dave Chappelle said it best, "Its like if I wear a police uniform, and you ask me for help, and I say, 'Oooh, I'm not a cop.'"
7. Don't get sloppy.
If you can't handle your liquor, I know you can't handle me.
8. Don't ask me to dance if you're not going to “Back that Thang Up.”
I will only two step to a few songs. Swag.
9. Just because I buy you one drink, don't expect to put all your drinks on my tab.
You haven't earned that privilege yet. Slow your roll.
10. Don't bring up your ex. And even after you actively attempt to not mention him, do not let on that you are still bitter from your last relationship.
If we need to explain the reasons behind this please email us this request. We will formally lay out the full reasons why this is a piss-poor idea and graphically detail how pungent the smell of “BitterBitch” is.
11. Do not let on that you do not suck dick.
This isn't as ridiculous as you assume it is. During your first meeting no guy wants to hear about the sexual limitations you have. Even if you “don't do that,” that is a conversation for a later date. And, frankly, one of two things will cross my mind if you do tell me you don't 1.) To quote Lil Wayne, “I don't fuck with bitches with the stadium!/ That's no dome/ Bitch go home//” or 2.) That's what they all say before they suck dick.
12. Don't ask if I'm going to call you.
Desperation is a clear sign of those losing... habitually. The game is only fun when the other party involved stands as a worthy player.
13. Don't friend me on Facebook and write on my wall the same night we met.
I won't be calling you.
Alright, so possibly we let the most aggressive of us narrate this one for you. The main points still stand. Do you disagree? Or have a corresponding list of what guys shouldn't do when making the first impression? Leave us a comment below or email us at thebirdsandthebees10@gmail.com. We're always interested in what you have to say...assuming it isn't politics or religion.
How does every relationship start? “Hello.” Everyone with whom you've been intimate you met first. Ladies, for you, we've compiled a list of “Do Nots” to avoid making a bad first impression. But why wouldn't we compile a list of things to do to make a good impression? Because between the four of us we have four different perspectives on what leaves an impressive impression. Not all of us would have accepted being told that a young lady wouldn't be able to accept an invitation to a party because she had a previously arranged (presumably sexual) engagement that evening. A wise man once said, “That [girl] has no manners.” And now that young lady and the receptive young man are in the strongest relationship since the ending of Date Night. “But that ending wasn't very strong.” Yes, and this one either. Get it?
Anyways, it's much too simple to misstep during your first meeting with a guy. We can't account for all variables, but these are assured things NOT to do to lower the chances of such an out of line footfall. Here's the list as it would be read by one of our staff members (Hint: it's not [Doogie Howser,] MD) :
1. Don't keep staring if you're not going to talk.
I know its usually the man's job to be the aggressor, but, honestly, I know about the suffrage movement too. It's 2011, you can take the initiative too.
2. Don't give me the eyes when your man is in the room. Bad etiquette. Now I'm not a home wrecker, but you put enough blood in the water...you catch my drift.
3. Do not blend in with the crowd.
The beauty of many of the settings in which we meet people is how anonymous we can be to those that don't know us. We let loose and act in the group mentality. Stop yelling as your girlfriends pass you. I understand that you enjoy being out with your friends, but the tribal shriek of excitement is not cute.
4. Do not discuss a heavy topic (i.e. politics) unless you are ready to have a serious conversation and are willing to defend yourself/ No religion or politics talk please.
This depends heavily on the recipient, but until you gauge whether or not this is the kind of guy that refuses to take you seriously if you are only providing small talk avoid such topics.
5. Do not play dumb under the irrational belief that it somehow makes you physically more attractive.
6. Don't wear a skimpy outfit and spend the entire time tugging at your skirt and trying to hide your cleavage. You spent at least an hour getting dressed with the lights on; you knew what look you were going for.
Speaking of which, if you look like a hoe I'm going to assume you're a hoe. Dave Chappelle said it best, "Its like if I wear a police uniform, and you ask me for help, and I say, 'Oooh, I'm not a cop.'"
7. Don't get sloppy.
If you can't handle your liquor, I know you can't handle me.
8. Don't ask me to dance if you're not going to “Back that Thang Up.”
I will only two step to a few songs. Swag.
9. Just because I buy you one drink, don't expect to put all your drinks on my tab.
You haven't earned that privilege yet. Slow your roll.
10. Don't bring up your ex. And even after you actively attempt to not mention him, do not let on that you are still bitter from your last relationship.
If we need to explain the reasons behind this please email us this request. We will formally lay out the full reasons why this is a piss-poor idea and graphically detail how pungent the smell of “BitterBitch” is.
11. Do not let on that you do not suck dick.
This isn't as ridiculous as you assume it is. During your first meeting no guy wants to hear about the sexual limitations you have. Even if you “don't do that,” that is a conversation for a later date. And, frankly, one of two things will cross my mind if you do tell me you don't 1.) To quote Lil Wayne, “I don't fuck with bitches with the stadium!/ That's no dome/ Bitch go home//” or 2.) That's what they all say before they suck dick.
12. Don't ask if I'm going to call you.
Desperation is a clear sign of those losing... habitually. The game is only fun when the other party involved stands as a worthy player.
13. Don't friend me on Facebook and write on my wall the same night we met.
I won't be calling you.
Alright, so possibly we let the most aggressive of us narrate this one for you. The main points still stand. Do you disagree? Or have a corresponding list of what guys shouldn't do when making the first impression? Leave us a comment below or email us at thebirdsandthebees10@gmail.com. We're always interested in what you have to say...assuming it isn't politics or religion.
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